Spaceman Neal Armstrong first appeared on the first Holidaze comp under his old arthouse weirdo act Gangrene and Blue with one of my favourite oddball holiday outliers "Binders Full of Christmas". He returns here with bandmate and partner Yasmine Emily representing their larger devolutionary art-punk attack Martian Crisis Unit on a song about fascist implementation of Christmas spirit set to the damn Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy. ACAB includes Christmas Cops. Trust the spacepeople.

In this bleak and icy cityscape
Haters hate
and decorate
it's christmas once again
and if you don't want to celebrate
anticipate
dictator
will put you in the pen
for you see, their holiday decree
requires thee
jollity
by penalty of law
better be good
for the naughty
face the wrath of
christmas cop
No one wants a candy caning from the Christmas Cop
A.c.a.b.
No one wants a candy caning from the Christmas Cop
A.c.a.b.
He's merry and he's scary
He loves gingerbread
if you hear his Jingle bells
You'll likely end up dead

He's a Christmas cop
And his badge gleams just like tinsel bright
A ghastly sight
in fridgid night
that's not cold as his heart
He imposes love and yuletide cheer
with threats severe
you'll live in fear
of the Christmas courts
Even Santa would not work his shift
enforced with fists
a violent gift
that can never be stopped

you must resist
do not get blitzed
off the wish list
of the christmas cop